- albertkirkjunior
Taps Aff
Albert Kirk Jr
A think A'll tak ma tap aff;
It's awmaist ten degree;
A ken it isnae simmer
But thon disnae bother me;
The sun is gey near keekin oot
Ahint an Aprile clood,
An sic a ferlie gars me
Dae ma haundlins semi-nude;
A want tae shaw the weemen-fowk
Ma Taylor Swift tattoo:
Her coupon's on ma belly
An ma navel is her mou;
A'll hiv tae shave ma titties but
Tae redd them o thir hair
That growes as gleg as Tories fib
An trauchles on the flair;
An syne A'll wash ma oxters
Tae stap them gettin funky
(Juist in case a lassie wants
A wee bit dippy-dunkie);
An whan A'm guid an ready
A'll cut aboot the street
Shankin wi ma tap aff
Tae gie the quines a treat.