Albert Kirk Jr noo is no the time tae act anent the murthert weans: maws an das ur greetin yet fae Texas tae Ukraine, Winnenden tae...

Albert Kirk Jr Whit kind o fandan Gangs on the randan An disnae ken Pairty's the patter? He'll tell us aw neist A faimin's a feast An ten...

Albert Kirk Jr A'm fasht wi ma bahoochie; A'm urnae feelin weel; A'm siccart tae the cludgie Wi an erse that's lik the Deil; A et a...

Albert Kirk Jr Boris disnae gie a fuck Aboot yer fuckin greetin, Sin gin he draps a bollock Aw he dis is haud a meetin: Heidyins fae the...

eftir the bairns' buiks bi Fiona Watt Albert Kirk Jr Thon's no wur Union: its weans urnae stairvit. Thon's no wur Union: its hooses ur...

Albert Kirk Jr A lass fae Auchtermuchty Cuid cleck a cuir for cancer Or seek the pairt o Noah's Airk An come up wi the answer; An lads...

Albert Kirk Jr pishin doon, pishin doon, it's aye fuckin pishin doon; fae first Julie tae en o June, it's aye fuckin pishin doon;...

Albert Kirk Jr Gin Twitter's fou o heid-bangers hittin oot wi shite, threapin that this leid o oors isnae wirth a mite, dinnae get aw...

Albert Kirk Jr Naething tae scrieve aboot, Naething at aw; A think A'll juist pit Ma pincil awa An tak a wee meenit Tae wait for a thocht...

Albert Kirk Jr A think A'll tak ma tap aff; It's awmaist ten degree; A ken it isnae simmer But thon disnae bother me; The sun is gey near...

Albert Kirk Jr dinna canna willna maunna dinna canna willna maunna dinna canna willna maunna dinna canna willna maunna naw naw naw naw...

Albert Kirk Jr The Queen's no deid; She's awfy awfy weel; She's staunnin at a windae Watchin sodgers dae a dreel. The Queen's juist fine;...

Albert Kirk Jr The Union is pumped! A'body kens. Aw that wur speirin is hou will it en? Will it bi Scotland that sterts the thing gaun?...

Albert Kirk Jr The tods are eatin bairns agane. Thon's hou it soonds tae me: The bastarts skelloch ilka nicht As lood as lood can be. A...

Albert Kirk Jr a shilpit carle in a café chowes his tea alane an sits in a couthie dwam dautin a widden cuddy bocht A jalouse for a bairn...

Albert Kirk Jr Yer da juist votit Tory An syne he killt a wean An syne he cut its napper aff An shewed it on agane; An syne he et its...

Albert Kirk Jr A cannae feel ma hingmy; Ma whit-d'ye-cry-it's broke; Ma hoojimahadge is fawin tae bits; Ma thingmajig's a joke; A yiss...

Albert Kirk Jr Bairns ur in yer baws, lads! It isnae hard tae mind: Yer juist as muckle fankelt As yer braw an jonick quine; Gin...

Albert Kirk Jr the carles whae willnae let ye wale whit wey a bairn comes oot ur thaim that wuidnae let ye wale whit wey a bairn gangs in

Albert Kirk Jr Afore ye gang tae bed at nicht Content tae thole a deein licht, Tae gie yersel a mornin bricht Ye first maun cowp the...